No more minor key

Week 18, 2026

Does the changing of the seasons make you nostalgic? It does me. Actually, Autumn/Winter makes me nostalgic, then Spring/Summer makes me come alive again. I was cycling through Victoria Park last week and the smell of the sun on the trees and the sight of people on the grass momentarily transported me straight back to 2025. Lightning bolt. Remember me? Yeah, actually. I do.

Weirdest time of my life, I reckon. But a lesson a lesson all the same.

I‘m vaguely aware of the fact that I’m still moving through very strange times indeed. Hate to be a cliche but there’s just something more rollercoaster about not being in a long term relo. Like every day, everything might happen, or nothing might happen, but either way, you’re (probably) going to bed alone.

And I keep thinking to myself, "Wow, I bet I will have so MUCH to write about all of this once it’s over.” But you can’t do it when you’re in it. Maybe that’s why I failed at my one Substack a week: just too much doing to be endlessly reflecting.

This time last year, I became aware of energies again. About how you can switch it on, and off, and watch people around you react to that. Honestly, it sounds really woo woo, but sometimes I just know. My light is on. I’m wide open, I’ll say the joke, I’ll do the thing, I’ll summon what I need. And other times light is off. I’m going home. I’m sleeping it off. Phone on do not disturb.

It’s like you clear space for things to come in. Maybe you let go of something you were holding onto too tightly - an idea you have about yourself, a person, a belief you took with you from childhood that doesn’t fit anymore. And as soon as you loosen your grip, release it a bit, everything else can come whooshing in. Plug pulled. Atoms shift.

Last year I suddenly had all this energy and started summoning things. And for weeks, I kept saying to anyone who would listen: I keep getting everything I want. And then I got a healthy dose of what I needed and it brought me back down to earth, but for a bit, I was just putting stuff out there and getting it - magic.

And now, almost exactly a year later, I can feel it coming back again. And yes MAYBE it is just the seasonal depression lifting, and being able to leave the house without wearing fucking tights again. But I like to think it is something more special :) April-June is when we start getting what we want again. Magic three months, better get out there on your bike and soak it all up.

There’s also something about getting to this point of the year and seeing your hard work pay off. This year, I’ve done more exercise than I ever have before, spent more time slogging away at my laptop than I ever have before. And now I can hold a plank, and wear better clothes, and not feel physically sick every time I check my business banking app.

Lock in lock in lock IN Luba and I were texting each other every single day from January-March and would you look at that, all the locking in has unlocked something. And now we’re feeling a bit free. It’s very cool, especially for someone who has literally never been able to stick to anything in her life. Like Annie said in her Substack recently - the only thing I’d been able to devote myself to previously were random boys who didn’t want or didn’t deserve it 😀 and ain’t that fun.

I also told myself earlier on this year: stop listening to so much sad music, Jess. Oh you want to cry every morning getting ready? Maybe turn Phoebe Bridgers off?? My friends tell me that my mood is either scraping me off the ceiling or peeling me up off the floor. It’s sort of magic, and sort of infuriating, burning through emotions at a rate of knots but at least I have learnt: this too shall pass (lol), I am in control.

So now I cycle to work listening to Nelly Furtado, or the Tom Jones version of Burning Down The House (art). For any other certified SadGirls looking to open up their energy in the spirit of Spring, this might be my number one piece of advice: listen to music that isn’t in a minor key. Give yourself half a chance.

ICYMI, I went viral over on TikTok. Can you imagine how insufferable that has made me?